Ugh

I've gotten tired of this whole cancer thing. It takes a lot of energy to stay positive, or at least cynically snarky about the whole thing. I'm halfway done with chemo and completely wiped out. So there's another half to go, then a small chance of radiation, then reconstruction sometime next summer, then five years of Tamoxifen. So at least five and a half years until my husband and I can start trying for kids. I'm only 28 now, so it's not like it's going to be a geriatric pregnancy, but we'd decided we were ready NOW.

I know everybody says that survival is a journey, and I guess I'm only starting now, but it seems like a really tired metaphor. So I guess I'm complaining a little/a lot, but things could be so much worse. One of my nephews has a preschool classmate with cancer. So at least I can understand what's going on. Also, I've got a really great support structure. I pretty much get to laze my way through treatment, sitting on the couch half the time. Work has been great, and someone is there to sub for me for about a week after each chemo session. Not having to worry about my job or insurance isn't something to take for granted, I know.

But I'm still sick of having cancer.